I know that a lot of people think you can just turn off depression when you learn about what may cause it or when someone tells you that you’re incredibly valuable to them or that so many other people have worse lives than you do… And all those things are great points and wonderful and should be appreciated and knowing that you’re fortunate is good too, but that doesn’t make cloud go away. The point is, knowing something intellectually doesn’t necessarily change something on an emotional level. Sometimes you just wake up feeling hopeless and miserable for no good reason. Sure, stress and lack of self-care certainly can perpetuate it, but sometimes it’s just there and those other factors simply make it worse. Sometimes when you can’t breathe, when you feel like that cloud is sucking all the air out of the room and you’re drowning on your own breath, the logical advice doesn’t make a lick of difference. Sometimes you have to just push through and distance yourself and sometimes just bleeding yourself dry (figuratively speaking) is the only way to escape that drowning sensation. But the worst part is when talking about those awful things that cross your mind when you’re drowning, is others’ reactions, especially those you care for. The thing is, it’s not their fault and simultaneously, it’s not your fault. Laying blame in depression is a losing game. People want to help though and that’s a good thing, but with something like this, listening can be the only valuable tool.
